That Line Your Cell Phone Co. Gives You?

April 24, 2012 at 6:24 pm 5 comments

To avoid potential legal issues I will only identify my cell phone company as one whose name starts with the same three letters as a word in Latin that means “truth”. Believe me, there is no other possible connection between these two words. 

Hint (Thank you, LuLu): it may follow “In Wine” in a Latin phrase.

It fits that the corporate voice comes from below

My old phone is still operational, somehow it’s managed to escape the death sentence that every other one of my previous phones from this company ran into when they hit the two year mark. I don’t know if it has a built in count-down timer chip, or if this company sends out some sort of a coded death ray signal to have the phone self-destruct, but either way the norm is that the phone will die about the same time that the contract does, i.e. when the deal expires, the phone coincidently does as well.

Yep, two years and you’re out

That being said, my contract with them ended a few months ago, so yesterday I went to their showroom to decide if I should stay with them now that I’m more or less a free agent who could be paying for their service month to month.

 Can you hear me now? I said give me your wallet!!!

The No-Hitch-Cock “Dial-M” phone issued to “Free Agents”

My phone is still operational so I could, at least in theory anyway, just stay on with them without getting a new phone and being required to sign on to a new two year contractual agreement. A bit more about that contract… From the start it was explained to me that the locked in two year contract term with a massive penalty for ending it early was how they could amortize their giving me a new phone free or at a steep discount by paying a little extra each month.

Or so they said.

Next year’s model will be called the “ATM-LTE

When I asked the “Stepford Wife” (go ahead, google it) at the desk if this meant that if I was to go on using my existing and now paid off phone, would I then receive a reduced monthly rate because I don’t have a new phone cost to amortize? She became a deer in the headlight and tried to change the subject with: “But you’ll miss out on all the newest features that your newer phone can provide you with a new contract”. I think that she was programmed to use any and all variations of “you” and “new”, which in addition to rhyming are the corporate authorized replacement words for “free”, they are used repetitiously to attract those with the attention span of a hummingbird.

The upgrade model is “Hands Free

The new Hummingbird Feeder Phone, filled with features

I derailed her conversation and routed it back to my original question but sadly no explanation was forthcoming from her or anyone else on the sales staff food chain up to  and including the office manager for what I thought to be a simple and straightforward question; “When you say that my first two years of service payments have a built in extra monthly amount to pay down the cost of the phone you’ve provided to me for “FREE OR CHEAP”, after I finish paying for it, why does my ongoing bill continue to allocate this company money for something which I’ve already paid off? I left the office before the laughter even ended.

More Cel Phone grief? Click here for a related blog.

Unchain my phone, baby set me free…….

If you decide to take this question to your cell phone provider, please let me know if you have any better luck with it than I did. Oh yeah, click here for a previous post on a different cell phone issue.  

Here’s an update to this story

blogInsert

N.B., The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and / or quotes above (including those of my own) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but as we’ve found, success will have a million parents and failure will be an orphan.
Feel free to ignore any ads that are shown below this advisory, I don’t get to choose them and even more sadly, I don’t make a penny off any of them, so in the holy name of capitalism I rebuke and don’t endorse or support any of them, unless of course they’re made of funny stuff…..
P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….
FAIR USE NOTICE: THIS SITE CONTAINS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL THE USE OF WHICH HAS NOT ALWAYS BEEN SPECIFICALLY AUTHORIZED BY THE COPYRIGHT OWNER. I AM MAKING SUCH MATERIAL AVAILABLE IN MY EFFORT TO ADVANCE UNDERSTANDING OF ENVIRONMENTAL, POLITICAL, HUMAN RIGHTS, ECONOMIC, DEMOCRACY, SCIENTIFIC, AND SOCIAL JUSTICE ISSUES, ETC. I BELIEVE THIS CONSTITUTES A ‘FAIR USE’ OF ANY SUCH COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AS PROVIDED FOR IN SECTION 107 OF THE US COPYRIGHT LAW. IN ACCORDANCE WITH TITLE 17 U.S.C. SECTION 107, THE MATERIAL ON THIS SITE IS DISTRIBUTED WITHOUT PROFIT TO THOSE WHO HAVE EXPRESSED A PRIOR INTEREST IN RECEIVING THE INCLUDED INFORMATION FOR RESEARCH AND EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES. FOR MORE INFORMATION GO TO: HTTP://WWW.LAW.CORNELL.EDU/USCODE/17/107.SHTML.  IF YOU WISH TO USE COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL FROM THIS SITE FOR PURPOSES OF YOUR OWN THAT GO BEYOND ‘FAIR USE’, YOU MUST OBTAIN PERMISSION FROM THE COPYRIGHT OWNER.

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That Gaseous Bubble Surfaces, Again…. Act III, Scene II, Wherein I Cave To The Devil I Know

5 Comments Add your own

  • 1. lulumoretti  |  April 25, 2012 at 5:41 am

    Very good analysis of the situation. Excellent graphics. What do you call a gun-cell hybrid? Gunell? Lunge? Cellun? Glunce? (…#4 has a certain resonance)

    I can’t think about wireless service providers without getting an aneurysm. I’ve considered going the unlocked route, but met the same dead end. I will, at least, get some satisfaction giving American Telephone and Telegraph the boot come autumn.
    lulu

    Reply
    • 2. tcardoc  |  April 25, 2012 at 4:08 pm

      Stumbled onto a 7 step tutorial while attempting to help an old friend (not Jerry) make an iphone into a “straight talk” or “go phone” compatible device. So far, he’s out $120 for a used 3G with a broken sim slot pin (forget about buying a used phone off Craigslist) $30 for a useless straight talk sim, and about a month of his life and counting. I pay ATTila about $75 for 450 minutes and “unlimited” limited data.
      P.S. Glunce gets my vote-
      Tim

      Reply
      • 3. lulumoretti  |  April 25, 2012 at 5:43 pm

        Tim,

        ATTila. Sublime.

        Ah, yes. Attempts to use the service without being used by the service are always exhausting and futile. I’ve stuck with that particular group of incompetent sadists only because they offer the concept of Rollover. It’s taken 8 years for them to convince me that I’m the one being rolled.

        “Glunce”. A gulling lance.

        If you have five minutes and a fine micro-brew in hand, I invite you to read my blog describing ATTila’s 9 month attempt to defile my innate sense of order and beauty in the world. (Scroll down past comments on religion, death, and marriage.) (If you get to the oatmeal cookie recipe “Whitney’s Favorite” – and the only thing she didn’t have in the tub with her – please know I’ve reworked the molasses. It’s 3 tablespoons. Cut sugar to 1 cup.)

        lulu

        lulumoretti.com

  • 4. tcardoc  |  April 26, 2012 at 1:01 am

    Huh-
    I was figgerin’ GLock + something. Maybe dUNCE.
    Have beer, will travel. Moron this later.
    Tim

    Reply
  • 5. mr. taylor  |  August 13, 2012 at 8:57 pm

    wow very nice phones

    Reply

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