Then I Said, “Wilde, About Those Nipples…”
There are a few really outstanding points worth seeing in “Cowboys and Aliens”, and they both appear on screen at the same time (well, they do usually travel in pairs). This happens whenever Olivia, I pronounce her name “Ooh-Livvv-yah, Wilde appears on screen. She happens to be, in my humble opinion, one of the most beautiful women in the world and well worth wading through all those old “House” reruns just to catch a glimpse of.
You might think with all the millions they spent on cast, crew, equipment, special effects and all, there might have been a few dollars left in the budget to pick up a bra for the exotic Olivia, after all, she’s the lead actress. I’m not complaining about this one bit, I just see it as a safety issue since someone could have lost an eye had it been a little colder on the set. And what a fine set that is, what with all of the see-through wardrobe items at work, especially in those that got wet in the rain and river scenes. And I’m not going to mention the re-birth rise she does from the campfire, except that, well, I guess that I just did.
I heard that there might have been some stuff in this film about space aliens blowing things up and killing people, and that James Bond and Han Solo (sometimes referred to as Daniel Craig and Harrison Ford) are supposed to be in this movie, but I was a little pre-occupied visually, if you get my drift. Maybe you can find a review some women wrote to find out more about them.
And, among all of those dozens of writers, producers, and folks downstream from them (I’m always sort of put off when there are more producers than grips listed in the credits), you’d think that there might have been at least one of them that did their simple physics/geography homework and realized that if someone is launching a normal “crack of dawn” sort of posse chase and that character says they will go North, a direction in which he supposedly then points towards, the actors and horses shadows should be falling on the actors left side (a.k.a. Camera Right). That is, of course, if he’s pointing North and the sun is rising as it usually does, in the East. This reminds me a little bit of how in Apollo 13 former Bosom Buddy actor Tom Hanks was relaxing in his backyard looking up at the moon which, in a shot of his point of view, we see he blocks on and off with his thumb. However, in the reverse of that point of view shot where you would suppose since he was out in the dark yard, the light on his face would have to be coming from the moon yet that thumb shadow is somehow not only not on his eye, it’s not even on his face, but shows up off to one side on the cushion. One tricky moon there, showing us how the shortest distance between two points (o.k. already, enough about Olivia) is one straight line that, it seems, might get bent a little as needed for lighting purposes.
Artistic License gives the moon’s light a slice, or is that a hook?
N.B., The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of my own) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but as everyone knows, success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan.
Feel free to ignore any ads that are shown below this advisory, I don’t get to choose them and even more sadly, I don’t make a penny off any of them, so in the holy name of capitalism I rebuke and don’t endorse or support any of them, unless of course they’re made of funny stuff…..
P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….
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Entry filed under: Uncategorized. Tags: a fine set it is, a slight slice, body double, cowboys and aliens, crack of dawn posse, if it had been colder on the set, nipple danger, olivia wilde, one tricky moon, or a hook, rise from the campfire, the sun is rising as it usually does in the east, thumb shadow, tom hanks apollo 13.