You Can’t Outrun Stupid
That title line is not a reference to racing Sarah Palin or any of the other idiots now jockeying for a position on the presidential ticket. I turned on the news at 10pm Saturday night expecting to see if any of the dreaded / expected traffic jams on the other L.A. area freeways were happening because of the 405 freeway closure.
Instead, I was surprised to see a “Breaking News” banner saying a high speed chase was going on in and around downtown L.A. This is the kind of programming that our local stations love to run since there’s no cost for them other than fuel for their helicopter, and a huge t.v. audience always finds it and is glued to the tube for the duration. And about duration, it’s nearing three hours so far in this case but it’s not long enough for the driver to get away, much less take a leak. In all the chases I’ve seen, and it seems that there’s at least one a week, no matter how fast the car is it can’t outrun a radio. The helicopter locks in and the driver never gets away. And you can spell that N.E.V.E.R…..
You’d think that after enough of these events go down these idiots would get the message that once the helicopter arrives it’s game over and time to just pull over, slowly get out of the car with your hands behind your head, and then lay down and be quiet before the dogs are set loose on you.
O.K., it’s 45 minutes later and I’m still watching, as if I have a choice? In tonight’s episode, the driver has been said to be a guy with three felony strikes on his rap sheet, one who has declared on his cell phone that he will not surrender because it means a likely life sentence of being the husband or wife in prison for him for kidnapping. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that it seems that he has a hostage with him. Well, alas and alack, no on screen ending tonight, happy or otherwise, because the pursuit has exceeded the helicopter’s broadcast range as the chase goes on speeding North on the 5 freeway towards Bakersfield. However, 5 minutes after it went off the air there was a report that a spike strip across the freeway has brought the chase to an off camera ending, ho hum. At least I now have an actual new favorite quote from a news reader that I heard going live during this chase: “It gets so dark up here that it’s unsafe to fly, especially at night”. Perhaps we’ve found a soul mate for George W. Bush?
N.B., The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and / or quotes above (including those of my own) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but as we’ve found, success will have a million parents and failure will be an orphan.
Feel free to ignore any ads that are shown below this advisory, I don’t get to choose them and even more sadly, I don’t make a penny off any of them, so in the holy name of capitalism I rebuke and don’t endorse or support any of them, unless of course they’re made of funny stuff…..
P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….
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Entry filed under: Uncategorized. Tags: breaking news, dreaded / expected traffic jams, high speed chase, KCAL channel 9, no matter how fast the car is, once the helicopter arrives it's game over, the driver never gets away, the husband or the wife in prison, you can't outrun stupid.