When people ask me “What do you do for a living?”, the comic in me wants to respond with “You call this living?”. Some days it’s difficult to keep off that slippery slope of humor, especially when you’re wearing skis.
Most days, I work as a sound mixer on films, t.v. shows, commercials, whatever comes along that requires someone to record sound. To say “I work” is a bit of a stretch, since the hardest part of my job is getting the job.
Sound mixers are often mistaken for Teamsters or mile markers on the highway, since none of us moves very much or (other than in an earthquake) very far.
About that humor slope, here are some “On the set” jokes that pertain to film crew folks.
1. How tall is the average sound mixer?
No one knows, since no one has ever seen one stand up
2. What do Teamster’s kids do on the weekend?
Watch other kids play.
3. How many producers do you need to screw in a light bulb?
Producers don’t screw in light bulbs, they screw in hot tubs.
4. What happened when a teamster had a heart attack on a stage at Universal?
Paramedics had to wake up 14 teamsters to find the correct one.
5. The difference between a DP (director of photography) and God?
God doesn’t think he’s a DP.
6. How does a Production Assistant double his car’s miles per gallon?
He takes down the Domino’s Pizza delivery sign.
7. How many stunt men does it take to change a light bulb?
It takes 20 stunt men, 1 to change the bulb, 19 to say they could have done it better.
Enough for now, check back in near the end of the month for more.
Entry filed under: Uncategorized. Tags: average sound mixer, do for a living, domino's pizza, dp, film crew, mile markers, mistaken for teamsters, on the set jokes, producers, production assistant, screw in a light bulb, slippery slope, stunt men, teamsters kids, watch other kids play.