Since weed users own 420, then….

May 26, 2008 at 2:52 am 1 comment

… What number could then be assigned to those of us that hold in high worship Ben and Jerry’s “Chunky Monkey” ice cream? 421? I haven’t used recreational drugs for more years than I can remember, but the high I get from this stuff is scary good. Perhaps my memory gap is caused by that early substance usage, but that’s another story for another day.

Ah, but I’ve digressed once again, so let’s get back to our exhibit “A”, the ice cream treat that should be available by prescription only, and the exact name of which I shall not mention again, lest I am forced to make a run for the freezer section of the local stop and rob.

Full disclosure, I have severe lactose intolerance. So there will be no spontaneous treats for me that come from a cow, pizza included. Sadly, all my dairy based consumables must be preceded by some sort of drug (Lactaid, for example) to prevent me from becoming even more unwelcome than usual as I move into the gaseous state. And, don’t ask about my “solid” state unless you’re prepared to give up pizza forever.

If you should happen to see me walking along holding a cup with the last remains of a (usually chocolate) milkshake held firmly in my hand, don’t make the mistake of following behind me into an elevator.

This should be considered a very strong safety warning if you’re vertically challenged. And it’s an especially important rule to follow if you’re that short and are smoking, and wish to keep your eyebrows. 

Oh yeah, about finding that number…… Well, I’m open to any suggestions other than 31 as Baskin Robbins seems to have a copyright locked that one up. And, don’t bother to suggest 13, the pot heads probably have that one sewn up too, you know that the 13th letter is “M”, and what with all that prison look tattoo nonsense…..

N.B., The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of my own) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but as everyone knows, success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan.

Feel free to ignore any ads that are shown below, I don’t get to choose them and (sadly) I don’t make a penny off any of them, so in the holy name of capitalism I rebuke and don’t endorse or support any of them, unless of course they’re made of funny stuff…..  

P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….

FAIR USE NOTICE: THIS SITE CONTAINS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL THE USE OF WHICH HAS NOT ALWAYS BEEN SPECIFICALLY AUTHORIZED BY THE COPYRIGHT OWNER. I AM MAKING SUCH MATERIAL AVAILABLE IN MY EFFORT TO ADVANCE UNDERSTANDING OF ENVIRONMENTAL, POLITICAL, HUMAN RIGHTS, ECONOMIC, DEMOCRACY, SCIENTIFIC, AND SOCIAL JUSTICE ISSUES, ETC. I BELIEVE THIS CONSTITUTES A ‘FAIR USE’ OF ANY SUCH COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AS PROVIDED FOR IN SECTION 107 OF THE US COPYRIGHT LAW. IN ACCORDANCE WITH TITLE 17 U.S.C. SECTION 107, THE MATERIAL ON THIS SITE IS DISTRIBUTED WITHOUT PROFIT TO THOSE WHO HAVE EXPRESSED A PRIOR INTEREST IN RECEIVING THE INCLUDED INFORMATION FOR RESEARCH AND EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES. FOR MORE INFORMATION GO TO: HTTP://WWW.LAW.CORNELL.EDU/USCODE/17/107.SHTML.  IF YOU WISH TO USE COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL FROM THIS SITE FOR PURPOSES OF YOUR OWN THAT GO BEYOND ‘FAIR USE’, YOU MUST OBTAIN PERMISSION FROM THE COPYRIGHT OWNER.  

 
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Republicans find a new use for gays… Got Lost? Again?

1 Comment Add your own

  • 1. Billy Arvia  |  May 28, 2008 at 8:02 pm

    Jerry

    I suggest 61.4. That is my current BMI thanks to ice cream.
    And peanut butter
    And potato chips
    And pizza
    And chocolate

    Reply

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