Why Did They Cut Off The End Of The Exhaust Pipe?

Chevrolet has announced plans to build and sell a special version of their small electrically powered car in Israel in 2015, where it will be marketed locally under the name “Geh Volt”.

Image

The Gentler Gentile U.S. Version, Called The Goyim!

A high-powered racy version will also be built, recognizable by the prefix “Oy” added in front of “Geh Volt”.

Oh yeah, perhaps a more appropriate title for this post would be “Why Does An Electric Car Need An Exhaust Pipe?”

N.B., The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame will not be so attributed. 

Feel free to ignore any ads that are shown below, I don’t choose them and (sadly) I don’t make a penny off any of them.

P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….

FAIR USE NOTICE: THIS SITE CONTAINS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL THE USE OF WHICH HAS NOT ALWAYS BEEN SPECIFICALLY AUTHORIZED BY THE COPYRIGHT OWNER. I AM MAKING SUCH MATERIAL AVAILABLE IN MY EFFORT TO ADVANCE UNDERSTANDING OF ENVIRONMENTAL, POLITICAL, HUMAN RIGHTS, ECONOMIC, DEMOCRACY, SCIENTIFIC, AND SOCIAL JUSTICE ISSUES, ETC. I BELIEVE THIS CONSTITUTES A ‘FAIR USE’ OF ANY SUCH COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AS PROVIDED FOR IN SECTION 107 OF THE US COPYRIGHT LAW. IN ACCORDANCE WITH TITLE 17 U.S.C. SECTION 107, THE MATERIAL ON THIS SITE IS DISTRIBUTED WITHOUT PROFIT TO THOSE WHO HAVE EXPRESSED A PRIOR INTEREST IN RECEIVING THE INCLUDED INFORMATION FOR RESEARCH AND EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES. FOR MORE INFORMATION GO TO: HTTP://WWW.LAW.CORNELL.EDU/USCODE/17/107.SHTML.  IF YOU WISH TO USE COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL FROM THIS SITE FOR PURPOSES OF YOUR OWN THAT GO BEYOND ‘FAIR USE’, YOU MUST OBTAIN PERMISSION FROM THE COPYRIGHT OWNER.  

March 10, 2014 at 11:27 pm 1 comment

I’m Looking At The End Of My Cycle (Days, That Is)

After many happy decades of riding motorcycles, reality has bitch-slapped me with the conclusion that it’s really time to check out of the two wheel world, and somehow after all these years doing it with all of my bodily parts intact.

I started my life of riding in 1964 on a Honda 305 Superhawk, followed by several decades that included more than a dozen other Hondas, several Suzukis and Yamahas, a Norton and (gasp) a Harley. 

So, what’s brought about the end of my being a rider?

There are two simple answers, they are: 1. My left knee and 2. My right knee. I’ve always been into what are sometimes called “Crotch Rockets”, bikes similar to the Cafe Racer style (especially my “Unapproachable” Norton 650 Atlas), a design that was made popular in areas around Grand Prix race tracks and outdoor european restaurants (and of course, in movies) starting around the mid-1960s, these bikes usually featured straight across and short stumpy handlebars, an elongated knee notch gas tank, upswept exhaust pipes, a single occupant seat for a low profile rider, and rear set pegs and controls.

There came a point a few years ago when I realized that I needed to stop every half hour or so, just so I could then walk around for a half hour or so and let my knees unknot and return to being usable joints once again. A few of my friends thought they were being helpful with suggestions that I ought to try a Honda Gold Wing (a.k.a. Goldwing, or old geezer bike) or some similar rolling yacht style two wheeled vehicle with a king and queen seat and accommodations for luggage that is ridden in the full upright position with feet resting on the floorboards. Sorry pals of mine, not in this lifetime.

To celebrate my many years of riding with no trips required to visit the ER, here are some tricks and methods I’d like to pass along, ones that I believe have helped keep me alive, I’d like to make a gift of them to current and future riders…

Image

To avoid needing it like your life depends on it, keep reading…

1. Always assume that everyone is trying to kill you. This may sound like an extreme measure, but if you’re able to observe this line of thought, someone who has thrown their car door open without looking when they got out of their parked vehicle or pulled out of a driveway without looking may not instantly decelerate you from 60 to zero and plant you into the ground.

2. When at all possible, never go through an intersection alone. Slowing down and allowing that Chevy full of drunk teens to pull along side of you may be hard on your ego, but their car will likely be far more noticeable to those random other drunks in those other cars that are blindly approaching from your 3 or your 9 ignoring the traffic lights, and in doing so lessen the chance of you being t-boned into the next realm of existence.

3. Never ride in the center of your freeway (or highway) lane. This is the usually darker pavement that has been working like the elephant burial ground, collecting and holding every drop of oil as it has leaked out of the thousands of cars that have driven on it, converting it into one very long and narrow ambient temperature iceless iceskating rink.

4. The wobbly headlight trick, so simple and so necessary even if not necessarily legal. All you need to do is insert a few soft rubber washers between the head of the mounting bolts and your headlight, thereby allowing the headlight to have a little jiggle in it as you drive over the bumps and other road irregularities, making it (and you) far more noticeable to oncoming traffic.

And finally,

5. Go ahead and wear an actual DOT approved full coverage helmet instead of one of those goofy yet trendy but useless German WWII looking pieces of crap that basically will do nothing for you if you do go down. I’ve never thought helmets were of much use other than possibly allowing your family to have an open coffin service for you, but with that being said, if you have to (depending on the laws of your state or province) wear a helmet, then wear a full face helmet, ideally one that’s either white or some other reflective and visible at night color.

Good riding to you, potential organ donor!

N.B., The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame will not be so attributed. 

Feel free to ignore any ads that are shown below, I don’t choose them and (sadly) I don’t make a penny off any of them.

P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….

March 7, 2014 at 7:47 am Leave a comment

See The U.S.A. That’s Inside Your Chevrolet…

I saw an ad in today’s Los Angeles Times for Chevrolet’s annual “Chevy Presidents Day” sale, and it got me thinking that as I’m getting older and the motion picture industry I work in continues to export an exponentially increasing numbers of jobs to other states or countries based on their tax incentives, next year I might find myself celebrating “Chevy Residents Day”.

Why Yes, I Do Have A Mobilehome

Why yes, I do want one of those mobile homes!

This is because I might be living in my Outlander van.

faster home

I’m saving for a smaller, faster home!

N.B., The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame will not be so attributed. 

Feel free to ignore any ads that are shown below, I don’t choose them and I don’t make a penny off any of them.

P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….

February 16, 2014 at 3:46 pm Leave a comment

A Piece Of Crap Absorbed By A Bigger Piece Of Crap

It’s official now, Time Warner Cable has been sucked up by the hive and has become yet one more cog in the huge miserable machine that is Comcast, a company that (since 1985) I’ve called ComCrap, a.k.a. Com(pletely)Crap, and that’s when I’m in a charitable mood. This move puts Time Warner Cable into the Ancient History division for me, I won’t continue to do business with them, nor allow anyone I know to so either. For those who were even moderately unhappy with the benign neglect that was the signature treatment from TWC, all I can say is BOHICA.

Image

It’s A Comcast Thing, You Wouldn’t Understand

This hits home with me as seriously as a heart attack because despite my choice of cutting off my cable for T.V. service three or four years ago and using an old school, which is the only school I know, roof mount style Radio Shack antenna instead, I’m aware that I still need some sort of connection for my internet service for a while longer until I get more comfortable with the idea of using a program that allows me to sidestep the cost of paying twice to the VERItably greediest bastards in the world of scumbag cel service companies for the use of my cel phone as an internet access hot spot to feed the daily browsing of my MacBook.

N.B., The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame will not be so attributed. 

Feel free to ignore any ads that are shown below, I don’t choose them and I don’t make a penny off any of them.

P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….

February 13, 2014 at 6:11 am 1 comment

Advance To The Rear

It’s rumored that Kim Kardashian spent a few hours with a psychiatrist talking about a feeling she had of constantly being followed.

The doctor asked her to describe who or what it was that was following her.

Kim said she thought she had sometimes noticed reflections in her bathroom mirror of two short bald fat guys.

The doctor hesitated to answer her quickly because he was thinking of how much he would lose in billable hours if he told her what she had perceived as two short bald fat guys behind her was just her ass jiggling.

 Image
The Usual Suspects, Rounded Up

N.B., The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame will not be so attributed.

Please note that parody and humor are still protected by what’s left of the post-Bush constitution.

Feel free to ignore any ads that are shown below, I don’t choose them and I don’t make a penny from any of them.

P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….

N.B., The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame will not be so attributed.
Feel free to ignore any ads that are shown below, I don’t choose them and (sadly) I don’t make a penny off any of them.
P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….
FAIR USE NOTICE: THIS SITE CONTAINS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL THE USE OF WHICH HAS NOT ALWAYS BEEN SPECIFICALLY AUTHORIZED BY THE COPYRIGHT OWNER. I AM MAKING SUCH MATERIAL AVAILABLE IN MY EFFORT TO ADVANCE UNDERSTANDING OF ENVIRONMENTAL, POLITICAL, HUMAN RIGHTS, ECONOMIC, DEMOCRACY, SCIENTIFIC, AND SOCIAL JUSTICE ISSUES, ETC. I BELIEVE THIS CONSTITUTES A ‘FAIR USE’ OF ANY SUCH COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AS PROVIDED FOR IN SECTION 107 OF THE US COPYRIGHT LAW. IN ACCORDANCE WITH TITLE 17 U.S.C. SECTION 107, THE MATERIAL ON THIS SITE IS DISTRIBUTED WITHOUT PROFIT TO THOSE WHO HAVE EXPRESSED A PRIOR INTEREST IN RECEIVING THE INCLUDED INFORMATION FOR RESEARCH AND EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES. FOR MORE INFORMATION GO TO: HTTP://WWW.LAW.CORNELL.EDU/USCODE/17/107.SHTML.  IF YOU WISH TO USE COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL FROM THIS SITE FOR PURPOSES OF YOUR OWN THAT GO BEYOND ‘FAIR USE’, YOU MUST OBTAIN PERMISSION FROM THE COPYRIGHT OWNER.

February 12, 2014 at 3:29 pm 1 comment

The Big Bang Theory Demonstrated On A Small Campus

News reports today say that 22 Iraqi muslim student militants studying the craft of suicide bombing were killed when the instructor for their entry level “Beginning Terrorism 101″ class accidentally used an armed belt during a demonstration. 

Push the red, not the blue button

O.K. class, which button we never push?

Two questions come to mind:

1. Was that instructor hired on the basis of his submitting the lowest bid for the job or because his uncle ran the school?

and:

2. Assuming that the instructor (or his remaining parts) was not in a flash demoted to infidel, do you think that they are going to have to outsource in order to be able to find 1,584 Virgins (72 each for the 23 martyrs) in Iraq? I mean, it’s possible that there could still be that many virgins in Iraq, but I wouldn’t bet my money (or my life) on it.

N.B., The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame will not be so attributed. 

Feel free to ignore any ads that are shown below, I don’t choose them and I don’t make a penny off any of them.

P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….

February 10, 2014 at 9:12 pm Leave a comment

Things That Could Make Me Puke?

1. Someone sitting next to me in a poorly ventilated room throwing up .

2. Looking down at an apple I’m eating and seeing only half a worm.

3. Scratching at a scab and then sticking that finger deep in my mouth.

4. Learning that another member of the Bush family is entering politics.

5. Tied to a chair and forced to watch five minutes of “How I Met Your Mother”.

6. Same as # 5, but it would only take one minute of watching “Super Fun Night”.

                                                        And you?

February 6, 2014 at 5:47 am Leave a comment

Older Posts Newer Posts


Categories

  • Blogroll

  • crew

  • funny

  • scripty

  • Sound mixer

  • Feeds


    Follow

    Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.