Archive for June, 2012

The Dissenting Opinion From Clarence Thomas

Many Americans were very surprised when they heard that Supreme Court Justice Clarence (UnkaThom) Thomas had submitted a 500 page dissenting opinion on the recent vote on the so-called ObamaCare plan for medical insurance reform.

Less surprising was that what he submitted was completely in keeping with his long term history of contributing nothing to any case before the court, it was actually a 500 page unopened pack of printer paper, and it should be noted, one which still had the original Big Lots price tag firmly attached to it. 

Hey, did someone format this disc? It’s F’n empty!!!

So what we can surmise from this is that the writing ability of Justice Thomas is at least equal to his well documented speaking skills that he has displayed on a number of cases that have appeared before the court.  By the way, that number of cases mentioned in the previous sentence is often expressed as  “none”.

A rare example of writing by Clarence Thomas?

It seems he’s following the dictum often attributed to Abraham Lincoln, which said something like “It’s better to keep your mouth shut and have people think you a fool than open your mouth and prove it”.

If you cover your eyes and don’t snore, no one will know you’re sleeping

Or, maybe that’s what his wife Virginia (Scary Spice) Thomas told him to be sure that she wouldn’t have her company “Liberty Consulting” lose the contacts she’s made from many of her high paying jobs that she’s performed as a lobbyist?

Anita wasn’t fit to touch your Coke can, babe!

All this from a guy that once used “But really now, any fool can see that she’s black!” as his main defense against Anita Hill’s sexual harassment charges.

Who you gonna believe, me or some curly hair?

The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame will not be so attributed. 

P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….


June 29, 2012 at 5:59 pm Leave a comment

A China Trickle Down Syndrome Theory

Mitt “Just call me el Gringo” Romney actually displayed some emotions yesterday after his main financial backer,  Sheldon Adelson, told him that he was going to spend billions of his corporate dollars to build a huge casino in Spain, a country where unemployment is well over 20 percent. Adelson was clearly elated when he told Mitt that he will pay peanuts in Pesetas (O.K., I know they deal in Euros, but then I’d lose that alliteration joke) to hire about 260,000 desperate and out of work locals to build it for him, and he told Mitt that he was sure that he’d be getting their votes at the same time as a two-fer.

Mitt’s range of emotions can go from “A” to “B”

A visibly shaken Romney roared back at Sheldon “Are you having another one of your Senior Moments, señor? This is not what I was talking about when I said we needed to reach more Spanish speaking voters, I meant Spanish speaking voters who will vote in America”. 

Sheldon doing his wild “Ray Charles” impersonation.

And we see get closer to that slippery slope by the day

After an extended search of the internet, I’ve not found even a single photo that shows Mitt in the same room with Sheldon, much less one of Mitt performing oral on that old fart, so there may be no truth to those pervasive rumors going around that it’s more than an expected huge return on his investment that keeps Mr. Adelson giving the big bucks to his most recent big buck who he refers to as Mary Cohen. After all, Callista Gingrich is younger and hotter than Ann Romney, so if the candidates really were whoring their wives out, there must be something I’m missing that could explain why Sheldon dropped Newt for Mitt. Or maybe it was because Mitt showed up with well worn kneepads? 

Stay tuned here for the next “Mitt-iteration, it’s just a flip and a flop away

What’s that? You actually think Newt was used as even more of a “Tool” than most sane people have always said he was? That Newt’s real purpose as an independent contractor working for the owner of the Sands Hotel and many fine gambling establishments in Macao and other far flung places was to take the heat and shunt the other runners in the campaign into the extreme right gutter so Romney could be sort of squeaky clean at the end of the primaries? Well, yeah, me too……

N.B., The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame will not be so attributed. 

Feel free to ignore any ads that are shown below, I don’t choose them and (sadly) I don’t make a penny off any of them.

P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….

 

June 24, 2012 at 3:38 pm Leave a comment

Dunking Mitt In A Born Again Waterworld

O.K., here’s a somewhat subtle way for those Baptists and any other true believers who support Romney to try and influence his choice in his picking of a vice-presidential candidate from the religious right to be the one who will be his running mate.  This involves the adoption of a modified water boarding technique, one which some Baptists believe will help guide Mitt to make his choice be a divine one. After all, believing is what they specialize in, isn’t it? 

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I called it!!!

At the start of this media covered event, a priest will pop up out of the water and loudly shout “Marco”, and then quickly dive back under the water. With some well rehearsed timing less than a second later a different “True Believer” will pop up out of the water at the opposite end of the pool and shout out “Rubio”. 

Rubio!!!

B.R.R.R.R.RUBIO!!!!

Repeat as necessary or at least until Mitt smacks himself in the head and says “Hey, wait a minute folks, I just got a great idea…”.

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Marco Rubio boldly tests out the halo effect to try to appeal to the “Log-Cabin Republican” sector of the Republican Party for support. As fabulous as he may be, it just doesn’t work so well for him…

And then there’s that “bus” thing….

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Hmm, thrown under the bus or ride on top of it in a cage?

Yeah, I suppose that throwing people under the bus might be too subtle, but this has to be better than having each V.P. candidate be forced to be locked in a cage on top of a Las Vegas style tour bus provided by as has recently been decided by the Supreme Court, an unnamed donor, in an attempt to see how many hours he or (at least in theory anyway) she could endure of the ride without wetting themselves.

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A side bar on the rural America bus tour: It would be interesting to see if one of the people at each whistle stop the bus arrives at could get a photograph showing the license plate which is on that bus, and then e-mail that photo to a central location where it could be checked to see if Mitt is indeed only riding on one bus from location to location. I believe that it’s more likely that he has a few identical tour vehicles which have been provided to him by his main campaign angel (code named “Alta Kocka”) in a loan that you can be sure will  have to be repaid at a later date, the angel being that always warm and charming owner of Las Vegas and other world wide gambling Mecca’s, the 83 year old walking fossil that goes by the name Sheldon Adelson.

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Mitt drains his old hose while on the road again

Further, I’m guessing that while those multiple buses are busy leapfrogging to each subsequent stop, Mitt just hops on a small plane (O.K., to an Air Force Vet, a Lear Jet is a small plane) to fly to a small airport near the next meet and greet to board an identical looking bus hidden a few miles down the road, just a short hop to the next photo op. 

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Lexan in use since Mitt’s been on the bus!

Below is a photo of a bus that was used in another candidate’s campaign early on in the race for the nomination, this was a bus that knew enough to stay in its place, which means it was required to take the place at the rear of the bus tour train.

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Rick Perry’s Bus, it just looks bigger because it’s black. The choice of black for the color of the bus may hurt Rick’s chances with many Republicans.

The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame can not be so attributed.

June 21, 2012 at 3:59 pm Leave a comment

I Am Σπάρτακος (Spartacus), I’m With Eric Holder!

As a thinking person I give all the support I can to the election campaign for Barack Obama. This is because of both my total revulsion at even the thought of having anything to do with the possible election of any of the other parties’ Bozos, and the realization that our next president will very likely seat one or more Supreme Court Justice. If you still need a hint about why this second reason should blast you out of your complacency, remember that those are the same quislings who have given (or as some say, sold) the ownership of America to corporations.

President Obama’s Attorney General Eric Holder finds he’s about to be charged with Contempt of Congress and now is in the crosshairs of the political games being played by a pile of do nothing yahoos, a.k.a. a House Oversight Committee which has a recommendation heading to the House floor for a final vote, one that Speaker John “The Annoying Orange” Boehner has scheduled for a floor vote next week.

tear drop guy

Orange skin is natural, but only on oranges!

Obviously, there’s nothing on the horizon for Americans that’s more important for them to be working on at this time, I’m sure that somehow low employment and the financial crisis that our country is in will all auto-correct. Oversight indeed!

There’s nothing wrong with your monitor, don’t try to adjust the color

Because of the actions of this committee,  I’ve done an auto-reflex shift into the defensive mode regarding Mr. Holder, perhaps because I’m concerned that if I don’t,  I may end my days being hung on the very same Petard.

For the record, I’m as strongly in contempt of congress (although maybe in different context) as Eric Holder is, so you may as well call me Spartacus. I’ve been called worse and I’ll take the hit, but not the prison sense, I hope……

The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame can not be so attributed.

June 21, 2012 at 12:57 am 1 comment

Thoughts On Father’s Day, On Father’s Day….

Having no children (that I know of, anyway) leaves me with a lot of time to kill today, so I got to thinking on this special day about those few things that my father left me. At some point I realized that each of them can be clearly described in a few short sentences, i.e.:

1. I have  ahead of me a genetically ordained lifetime involvement to spend time with both the thrill of Gout and its somewhat effective countermeasure I laughingly refer to as *Allpurinol*.

2. I also have a predisposition towards high blood pressure, the kind that shows up on occcasion as random spikes on a chart during a physical exam, but otherwise dares not speak its name, maybe that’s why they call it the silent killer. *Lisinopril* is the blood pressure treatment that works fairly well, after all I’m still here to write this.

And of course last but far from least gift that I’ve received from my father is that most special inheritance of all;

3. Lactose Intolerance. The main feature about this speed bump on the road of life is that for the rest of my days I know that I’ll have to avoid eating pizza at a party, unless said party is going to be held in a family size room in an ethnic restaurant. I’m sure you’re aware that in such places no one would notice one more random smell capable of burning the hair out of your nose.  Korean restaurants are about the best example I can think of for this, since the fermentation that is Kimchi produces more than a passing similarity to the aroma of flatulence.

On A Windy Day In Heaven

Or perhaps outdoors on a very windy day, if you get my drift.

*Meds Provided by my friends at the Veteran’s Hospital*

The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame can not be so attributed.

June 17, 2012 at 12:59 pm Leave a comment

Warning, Rampant Memory Loss Is Going Around

There is something going around that has caught my attention, but I have no worries about being infected with it because it only shows up in those people who are members of, or share similar beliefs with Tea Party voters, or various other douche bags.

Would you like to try the quick and dirty test for it?

As quickly as you can Grasshopper, tell me the first name, middle initial, and the family name of the President of the United States who was (some say) elected to office after Bill Clinton finished his term, and somehow exited without being perp-walked out of office when Barak Obama started his. 

If you ask any of the the folks listed in the run on sentence that makes up the first paragraph, chances are that all you’ll get for an answer is a grunt and a simian-looking expression, one that you might find on a human struggling with constipation.

It might look something like this….

What’s that, you’re still waiting for a hint in Engish?

Well o.k. then, how about “Gee Whizz”?

The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame can not be so attributed.

June 13, 2012 at 3:09 am Leave a comment

Two sides of a piece of paper joke, revised

I remember first being the butt of the joke years ago, and being amazed at how simple yet to the point it was. In a nutshell (possibly the most appropriate analogy I’ve ever used), it went like this.

1. On one side of a piece of notebook paper, you need to write these words “How to keep an idiot busy for hours, see other side”.

2. On the other side of that sheet of paper, you will just write those same words, “How to keep an idiot busy for hours, see other side”.

3. You then hand this piece of paper to a friend, and watch and see how many times they will flip it over in their hands before they crumple it up into a ball and throw it at your head.

The revision? Give someone the link <http://www.ted.com/&gt; and see how long it takes for them to  once again become an interactive and productive part of the human race. The answer to that last question is dependent on their talent in the multi-tasking department, TED is not mutually exclusive with regards to your brain activity, it just takes up a very, very large part of it.

Me? I’m on my fifth viewing of one of the more interesting choices I’ve found there. Watch it once and you may never spend your afternoons watching (not a real site, don’t bother looking) ElevatorGirlsInBondage.com again, you’ll be too busy deleting all of those mysterious cookies, clearing your cache, and trying to clean up your keyboard, if you get my drift….

I’ve been keeping busy flipping through the diverse possibilities from one end of TED to the other, but I’m sure I’ll have to stop soon, since I’m getting hungry and I’ll need to eat. Now if I could only remember who it was that gave me the TED link and started me down this path…….

6-12-12, An update… I’ve used the film title “Elevator Girls In Bondage” for years as a throwaway joke reference to low life films, but it seems that the joke’s on me. After doing a Google search to be sure that  there’s no web site by that name,  I found that there was an actual film made with that title.

Oh well, some of us get older and wiser, some just get older……

The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame can not be so attributed.

June 11, 2012 at 4:13 pm 1 comment


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