Archive for October, 2008

One small tug for mankind……

I feel it’s time that I step up and take credit for introducing one of the oldest jokes in America to a new audience in a country that was a part of the former Soviet Union, Ukraine. 

On my last trip Ukraine, visiting with the family and friends of my wife, I had the opportunity to pull the oldest gag I know of, the famous “Pull My Finger” routine, probably passed (so to speak) from uncles to nephews since the caveman days.  

I’m sure that my buildup of gas on that day, was due to the food I’d been eating for a few days, borscht being the prime suspect. So, feeling the, uh… pressing need to step outside and relieve myself of said gas, I motioned for my 14 year old nephew-in-law to step out on the balcony with me for a minute.

He wasn’t clear on what this was about, and because of a language barrier I couldn’t explain it, so we just walked out the door. He wasn’t sure if what I was motioning to him about meant for him, but he took the chance and translating my sign language, pulled on my finger.

Wham…Blam…Thank you Sam-O-Var!!! No “silent but deadly” fart there, it was more like the old fashioned mid-West American “barn burner” variety.

Sasha was doubled over in laughter.  After a few minutes his eyes stopped watering (from the joke, not the fart), and we were able to go back inside to have lunch, which of course included borscht. After about 20 minutes, I saw him motion to his father to step out on the balcony, and the “rite of passage” took on a new meaning there, in a small town a few hundred kilometers East of Kiev. 

And that’s the way it was, meanwhile, back in the USA……

October 30, 2008 at 6:59 pm 1 comment

Are you still doing it doggie style?

That’s a question for Todd when he has Sarah bent over the sled’s handlebar.

In accordance with the published and SPCA approved official Iditarod rules, before sled sex, all sled dogs must be first disconnected from the harness. This also is just common sense, as the team may get frightened by sudden high pitched squeaky noises, and run off leaving two embarrassed ( and perhaps bare-assed as well) people standing in the snow. There’s nothing in those rules about the participants in the snow drift sex using or not using a harness, but again, we hope common sense will prevail.

Here’s a noteworthy statement from Todd Palin, a guy who went off to Alaska as sort of a skinny guy, but came back a real husky fucker:

If you’re not the lead sled dog, the view of the bitch in front seldom changes“.


October 30, 2008 at 3:15 pm Leave a comment

Johnny, ya betcha we hardly knew ya!

John Sidney McCain,  it sure looks like you were set up and then blindsided by Karl Rove…..

You were totally manipulated like so much fodder to be used to blow off this election, and put the republicans in a better position for the next one, as whoever won this misbegotten race would be stuck with cleaning up this huge tragic mess that was left by the Bush administration, and end up looking like a tool no matter what they were able to do, knowing that it’s an undoable repair. 

Much in the same way a professional pool player will take what looks like a wasted shot that accomplishes nothing, what Rove has done is set up a patsy (no offense) to let the Democrats win this election and take the heat for the little to nothing that will be done during the next four years, thereby setting up a slam dunk for whoever will run in the 2012 election.

Sadly, that won’t be you, as you’ll be nearing 80 years of age, and that’s going to be just too hard of a sell to make to the youth vote. But if it’s any consolation, it won’t be that Snowbilly either, when you lose she will have to crawl back to Alaska with the stink of failure all over her, and she’ll have to deal with her own crisis as her ethics trials will still be going on.

The real loser here? Trig Palin.
That poor little kid will most likely dumped in a hospital’s waiting room somewhere in Nebraska since he won’t be of any use for her campaign any longer. 

 

Here’s a link for this page should you like to forward it to either someone you care about, or perhaps someone you’d like to piss off, whichever one happens to apply:

http://boskolives.wordpress.com/2008/10/17/johnny-ya-betcha-we-hardly-knew-ya>

October 29, 2008 at 5:14 pm Leave a comment

Dear Dear Wonkette, R.I.P.

There was a time when the best part of my (Non-working) day was going through the various posts on a politically oriented web site known as “Wonkette“, it was truly a great site with snarky humor of the blow milk out your nose style.

Sadly, over the past few months it has changed into a money making enterprise that is limited in what sort of comments it will allow to be published, I have to think this is based on a desire to not piss off their big money advertisers. I’m not against someone making money, I can understand that motivation, even though I have no sponsors to worry about losing. I still scan through their comments, and I’ll even post sometimes using different email addresses to get past the filter that otherwise will keep me off.

It’s just so sad, knowing what it used to be like before the Managing Editor, Ken Layne, started his Jihad, banning and outright deleting comments, even going so far as to brag about it in a column titled BINGE & PURGE a few days ago.

So, yeah, R.I.P. Wonkette

I miss all the “tehs”, “gayz”, and the other often used inside sort of jokes, but not enough to stalk it very much on a regular basis anymore.

Here’s a link for this page should you like to forward it to either someone you care about, or perhaps someone you’d like to piss off, whichever one happens to apply:

<http://boskolives.wordpress.com/2008/10/20/dear-dear-wonkette-rip/>

October 20, 2008 at 4:09 am 2 comments

Hey, it’s funny photos time!!!

Tina Fey revealed to be a Vulcan? Does she get to say “Live Long and Perspire, it’s Saturday Night Live” when she’s (pardon the expression) doing Sarah Palin?

Isn’t McCain doing a perfect imitation of “Calvin” from Calvin and Hobbes?

Quick Barack, jump into the  transmografier!

Dick Cheney below, shown in his Halloween costume from last year. The news is that this will be his way of blending in next year when he and “W” run off to live in extradition proof Abu Dhabi.

Speaking of Halloween, remember to drink in moderation, or this could happen to you:

Do you think those lines extending from the butt shown in the drawing below are to indicate which direction your should move your ass, or do they represent the very physical results you may have from having shots fired just over your head?

Never one to give up on her lost cause, Laura teaches and preaches to the choir.

Here’s a link for this page should you like to forward it to either someone you care about, or perhaps someone you’d like to piss off, whichever one happens to apply:

<http://boskolives.wordpress.com/2008/10/15/hey-its-interesting-photo-day/&gt;

 

The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and quotes shown above belong to their actual creators, credit is given when known.

October 17, 2008 at 1:00 pm Leave a comment

What!!! I’m in agreement with McCain???

Yes, it’s true. During the debate last night John McCain told Barack Obama that he, the one that’s often called “McSame”, was actually not George W. Bush. Most people would say that’s very obvious because Bush isn’t that old. Or that short.

Well, to quote the Firesign Theatre, “How can you be in two places at once when you’re nowhere at all” A quick study of the records backs this up, since it can be seen that he voted exactly the same way as Bush, but only did it 90% of the time. So yes, he’s really his own man, at least 10% of the time.

However, I’m still waiting for a confirmation based on his DNA before I will accept this 100%

In a somewhat non-related news event, Big Dick Cheney has once again made fools of his detractors.

He did this by having a doctor confirm that he does indeed have a heart. Sure, it’s a really tiny and defective black heart that can be examined best by a proctologist, but (no pun intended there) it’s now proven that he actually has a heart. Here’s a link for my page should you like to forward it to either someone you care about, or perhaps someone you’d like to piss off, whichever one happens to apply: < http://boskolives.wordpress.com/2008/10/16/what-i-agree-with-mccain/>

October 16, 2008 at 4:11 pm Leave a comment

Palin’s New Limo?

Have you heard the rumor about a new White House Limo that’s in the works for the wack job hockey mom that might be only a rapture finger away from the “end it all” button?


 

Below is a sneak preview of the inside details of the 2009 Zamboni that is soon to be delivered to the White House as a new presidential limo, to be put in service in January of 2009 if McCain wins. Please note the Secret Service has assigned the code name “When Hell Freezes Over” to this date, quite appropriate eh?

Since the shock of actually winning the election would likely push McGeezer straight into flat line status, thereby installing the Snowbillie into the Oval Office, the government is getting ready even now.

Above, First Dude Todd Palin is seen testing out a beta version of the new Executive Limo.

Above, here’s a look at a few Secret Service pursuit models, stored in the White House gargage…… 

Below, a sneak peak at the Zamboni “Sky-Liner” model, with the Escape Pod” option shown.

Todd Palin was reported to have said “Jesus H. Christ, that corners way better than my sled”, before adding “Hey, don’t be a tellin’ Sarah I said that, she really loves her them doggies that pull her sled, if you get my (snow) drift, and don’t confuse that with her pullin some dog train”.

The book that has replaced “My Pet Goat”, it’s to be read only in case of an attack on America.

Shhhhhh!

By the way, if you’re making a search of the the ‘net based on the keyword “Zamboni”, because of results of the NSA Eschalon technology search engine that’s now used by the government, the Secret Service may now be reading this posting on your computer along with you, without your knowledge or permission…..

Here’s a link for this page should you like to forward it to either someone you care about, or perhaps someone you’d like to piss off, whichever one happens to apply::

<http://boskolives.wordpress.com/2008/10/12/the-new-white-house-limo/&gt;

October 12, 2008 at 6:30 am Leave a comment

More than I had imagined….

In a previous post, I opined that a few major reasons for our expanding economic disaster, other than those which have been brought on by the constant bumbling of our moron president, are happening off camera, so that our unseen government could work to close off the entitlement programs that they are not able to touch otherwise because of public support. For example, should the budget be pissed away on an endless war in West Bumfucistan, or stuffed into the pockets of friends of, let’s say the (Bush Crime) family, well then, there’s just nothing available for all of those needy bastards, piss on them……

The trickle down theory made simple:

It’s just how gravity works, now do you get it? 
Some of the programs that they had been unable to get shut down in spite of years of trying include Social Security, Head Start Education, Food Stamps, Medicare (which Ronald Reagan saw as pure socialism), etc, etc. This is the sort of stuff that the mega rich have no need for and don’t want others to get, they feel that you can’t raise yourself higher than the crowd without pushing others down. Also, when you are able to keep the poor undereducated and in constant debt from medical bills and other financial trauma, then you can jerk them around forever. Or until they learn about the revolutions in France and Russia.

Well, another cause that I had completely overlooked has now become obvious to me. If they’re able to break the budgets of the individual states, there will then be a huge gain in the controls that can be placed by the feds on problematic (for the federal government) state level issues like medical marijuana use, equal voting requirements, worker safety, etc…. this done by using the threat of removal of federal funds from states that go against the fed’s grain on such issues. And the states have an almost uniform budget crunch going on now, what with the loss of taxes because of the economy. An infinite loop if you will.

Yep, this another work in progress, with more to be added soon. So, stop by a little later to read the thrilling non-conclusion to a problem that isn’t going away in our lifetime.

Here’s a link for this page should you like to forward it to either someone you care about, or perhaps someone you’d like to piss off, whichever one happens to apply:

http://boskolives.wordpress.com/2008/10/11/more-than-i-had-imagined/

October 11, 2008 at 4:29 am Leave a comment

She Got Pucked?

A small part of the debate you might have misssed:

Gwen Ifill: Governor Palin, please tell us the total of three plus one.

Sarah Palin: Gee wizz Gwen, I’m happy to do this. Ya know, as a hockey mom, I know lots about keeping score on the rink, and when a player has three points it’s called a “Hat Trick”, and if one other player, God bless his soul, gets one more point, then that team is doing pretty darn good for a bunch of regular NASCAR loving small town boys in Alaska, don’tcha know….

Gwen Ifill: Governor Palin, that total please……

Sarah Palin: Golly Gwen, you’re as pushy as those insider Democrats, can’t you give a mother of 4 or 5 kids a moment to catch her breath? Golly goodness, I just want to understand your question and not make a gotcha kinda mistake, like I did when I thought my daughter said she was pucked at the rink earlier this year, if you get my meaning there Gwen….

Gwen Ifill: Senator Biden, please tell us, what is the square root of 573 to the third power?

Joe Biden: Sure Gwen, it’s exactly…………

 

Here’s a link for this page should you like to forward it to either someone you care about, or perhaps someone you’d like to piss off, whichever one happens to apply:

http://boskolives.wordpress.com/2008/10/05/get-the-puck-out-of-here/

 

N.B., The ownership of any and all photos, opinions, and/ or quotes above (including those of mine) belong to the material’s creator(s). Credit is given when it’s known, but because success usually has a million parents and failure is an orphan, blame will not be so attributed. 

Feel free to ignore any ads that are shown below, I don’t choose them and (sadly) I don’t make a penny off any of them.

P.S., check back for occasional updates and rewrites….

FAIR USE NOTICE: THIS SITE CONTAINS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL THE USE OF WHICH HAS NOT ALWAYS BEEN SPECIFICALLY AUTHORIZED BY THE COPYRIGHT OWNER. I AM MAKING SUCH MATERIAL AVAILABLE IN MY EFFORT TO ADVANCE UNDERSTANDING OF ENVIRONMENTAL, POLITICAL, HUMAN RIGHTS, ECONOMIC, DEMOCRACY, SCIENTIFIC, AND SOCIAL JUSTICE ISSUES, ETC. I BELIEVE THIS CONSTITUTES A ‘FAIR USE’ OF ANY SUCH COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AS PROVIDED FOR IN SECTION 107 OF THE US COPYRIGHT LAW. IN ACCORDANCE WITH TITLE 17 U.S.C. SECTION 107, THE MATERIAL ON THIS SITE IS DISTRIBUTED WITHOUT PROFIT TO THOSE WHO HAVE EXPRESSED A PRIOR INTEREST IN RECEIVING THE INCLUDED INFORMATION FOR RESEARCH AND EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES. FOR MORE INFORMATION GO TO: HTTP://WWW.LAW.CORNELL.EDU/USCODE/17/107.SHTML.  IF YOU WISH TO USE COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL FROM THIS SITE FOR PURPOSES OF YOUR OWN THAT GO BEYOND ‘FAIR USE’, YOU MUST OBTAIN PERMISSION FROM THE COPYRIGHT OWNER.  

 

October 5, 2008 at 12:05 am 1 comment


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